Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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