awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
