i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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