Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
not ubering you a puppy
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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