Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
