I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
