So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
