I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
there is puke in my bra ... again
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