there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize
