You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
