I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I could make wine with my vomit
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
