Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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