we have pet lesbian snakes
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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