Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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