no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
