I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
