its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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