i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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