If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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