mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
