She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She even gives head with a lisp.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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