dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
