Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
