The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I intend to get homeless drunk
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
