I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
