Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
worst night to have a conscience
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize