You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
