my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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