I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
i dont even know how to be here
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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