I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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