My Higher Power is John Stamos
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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