apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
