I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
