I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
