i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
