Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
