ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
