What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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