Having a random hookup so left but love u
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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