Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
A bitchslap is in order.
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