Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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