Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
