operation have a gay friend backfired
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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