Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
If I die, sorry about rent.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
