I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Randomize
