found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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