You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
