question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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