You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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