god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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