If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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